slogging through the pit of despair (By Laura)

This has been a difficult week.  Why do I feel like I've said that before?

It seems that at every turn we experience resistance. There's tension between us, one of our daughters has turned against the idea of moving, I'm feeling low and tired, we're all sick with colds, it seems like no matter how strongly we feel about this change, we're bombarded from every side.

This isn't the first time I've felt this kind of oppression. There have been other times that I've had great ideas that felt so right, so good, and I have felt resistance from every side then too. But I've never experienced it to this level before.

We saw some places this week. We went out with our realtor to get a feel for what different sizes of places would be like. We wanted to know what an apartment would feel like at a certain square footage, or a townhouse at smaller square footage. It was educational, but emotional. As I said, one of our daughters has decided that she doesn't want to move. She's putting her foot down pretty strongly. Try as we might, we can't seem to convince her that it's a good idea. It's a tough time for her as she reenters the school year, starts new extracurricular activities, starts a new year of life. We're pretty sure it's all wrapped up in that, but the resistance is strong and we're struggling to know how to deal with it. No doubt she just wants one solid thing in her life right now: her home.

That's a hard thing. We're not totally sure how to navigate it. How much should a child's opinion of things we taken into account? Of utmost importance is that she feels heard and understood. But what if we just decided we were going to do it? How do we communicate that her feelings and thoughts and her anxiety means something to us while still going ahead with the plan? We know she will adjust, particularly when she sees that we get to be together more, and that we would get to be closer together physically. Of all our kids, she's the one that wants that close proximity, the snuggles, that family time - she pines for the nights that she gets to sleep on our bedroom floor with her sister (a weekly occurrence).. Still, it's not easy to figure out how to do this well.

We've been working on our house a lot. Purging, getting rid of things, giving things away, taking things to swap meets, and it all adds up to two tired adults and three tired children. I guess I'm feeling discouraged.

Nonetheless, Ryan and I still feel very convicted that this is the path for us. We need to walk in it. We need to figure out a way to do it in the best, smoothest, most peaceful manner. Neither of us could have imagined it being so difficult to simply carry through with a plan. We feel like we're in the pit of despair - there's a little shout out to Princess Bride for you… :)

We have appreciated so much hearing the words of encouragement from so many of you. In the form of emails, Facebook messages, phone calls, in-person chats, you've encouraged us and told us how inspired you are about this idea. You've told us that it has started your own wheels turning, that conversations have begun in your own lives. We can't tell you how amazing that is to hear, and in the difficulty of these days it really makes things brighter. We didn't really know what the reaction would be to this crazy idea. We had no idea it would have a positive impact on anyone. So it's really encouraging to see that happening.

So onward, into a new week. I wish each of you a happy, joy-filled, meaningful week in which you share rich moments with those around you. Thank you for tracking with us thus far. We look forward to telling you of the great things to come.