tea for two (By Laura)

Teacup empty.  Couch vacated.  Driveway cleared.  Quiet descends.

I just finished a nice long visit with a friend.  It was much needed.  I've had a few days of feeling spent, tired of housework, stressed out by meal prep and cleanup, exhausted with homeschool, exasperated with parenting, and so much more.  You know those days?

Here was my facebook status the other day:

Ever have one of those days when everything goes wrong? For instance, homeschooling goes so badly that you consider dropping your kids off at the local public school and booking a flight, and after working for hours getting your "for sale" house ready for a showing, and loading the antsy-pants kids into the van, the darn battery is dead because someone left a light on? And after a neighbour tries and fails to jumpstart it, finally BCAA comes and does it, then you drive off only to stop for much needed milk and a quick treat for your poor kids who have been waiting for hours, and turn off the van, only to return and remember you were supposed to let it run for at least 45 minutes, and the battery is dead again? Then you have to call the same BCAA guy and have him come jumpstart it again? Then you get to your destination, stay for dinner, and then forget the all-important much needed milk there? Then you get home and make lunches for the whole family for the next day, and bathe in the triumph of using ONE BANANA TO MAKE FIVE PB AND BANANA SANDWICHES? Naw, me neither.

I generally like to keep things positive.  I don't like to be too doomsday, too negative, too "life is all about me".  Some days it's hard though, so while I posted this miserable status, I had to make it funny, to at least have a good laugh about it all!!  And, I mean, it really was quite a feat - the banana thing.  

So it was nice to sit and talk.  It was nice to connect, to commiserate (she has kids herself, although older now, and can really relate to some of my feelings), to be heard and not judged.  It was also nice to listen and hear her stories, and her challenges, and her current life ongoings.  We talked about parenting, the amazing and horrendously difficult job of being a parent, and of course about our adventures in simplifying.  

As I was telling her about the journey, and as I was reflecting on it last night as well, some thoughts occurred to me, or rather, have been occurring.  They aren't fully formed, but they have to do with vulnerability.  

Vulnerability is SO hip these days, thanks to Brene Brown.  Yes, that woman has done some great work in communicating really important thoughts about vulnerability that is so good to hear and think about.  If you haven't already, check out this YouTube video of her at the Ted Talks.

So I've been thinking about this vulnerability thing.  I am someone, like so many of us, who really tries NOT to present my weaknesses to the world.  Apart from not really trusting peoples' reactions (and I'm a fairly sensitive person), I also worry that I'm going to be adding negativity into people's lives which bothers me.  I feel like if I'm vulnerable, and don't hide my negative side, or maybe we should say "all the sides of me", then somehow that will make life less enjoyable for others.

BUT WILL IT?

I am starting to think that no, it won't.  Possibly, just possibly, being vulnerable, putting myself out there, laying my thoughts out for the wolves, might just inspire.  It might get others to do the same.  It might, actually, bring me closer to others.

And this is what I'm seeing.

When I started this blog, or "we" actually, even though Ryan hasn't done a post yet..., it was a big step.  It was hard to make this whole idea public.  We worried that people would laugh.  Or roll their eyes.  Or tell us we weren't the first to think this up.  Or belittle us for some other reason.  We worried that people would think we were stupid, or crazy, or reckless.

I don't doubt that there are some who do think some of those things.  The thing is, this whole process has brought about such a huge wave of connection with people, we have been knocked right over!  So many people have been excited about this for us.  So many have talked about going through their own process of writing down their values.  It has been humbling.  Amazing.

So thanks for those of you who have spoken up and told us.  It's good to know we're all on these journeys, be the journeys similar or different from our own.  Onward into the day!

I'll have to talk more about this in an upcoming blog post, as my thoughts take more shape.  For now, little Pony just woke up and is in a wild tantrum rage in her crib.  Aaaah, real life descends once again.  Haha.